Digressive Ramblings

Wow that's heavy huh? Maybe it's heavy because I have a lot of hopes and dreams for the next 365 days and I don't know what I want to share... maybe I'll just be vauge New Location- I love my parents, but I can't be living there much longer Stability- a lot of decisions are being made the next few months that greatly impact my life, that needs to calm down Gainfully employed- I would like to keep my job (lots of layoffs right now around here) or find a better one I'm super serious about my weight loss now. I track what I eat, I work out so I want to lose weight. Is that so much to ask? Love: I'm in love with an amazing person. He's perfect for me. My hope/dream/goal is that I don't screw it up :)

Dearest Future Michelle, You're funny. I know life is just starting to turn around right now, but guess what, you're right -- this is your year! You know how you pretty much hate your job and schedule and stuff- it's going to get better. And that silly young boy you're not sure about- it's a good bet and investment. The positive thinking worked. Just stay calm, clinge to your belief that this is your year and good things will happen. Also, the money issues will go away :)  Just try to not indulge in so much food would you? It would make 2011 easier, but no now you're gonna have to to go to the gym all year to fix what you did in 2010.  Keep smiling and trusting, you will do great this year. Things will start looking up! Michelle

I LOVE listening to music. I am almost always listening to music. It's on when I'm in the car and it's on when I'm working. I can't even tell you how many conversations I've missed because someone comes and stands behind me at my desk  (or use to because I've graduated to a front facing desk) and I don't know because I have headphones in and I'm rocking out. That being said, music shapes most of my memories and I've come to find out that it shapes my emotions too much.  Today while at work I was getting very sad and depressed and I realized it's because of this song: I was so sad. Did I mention that I'm currently madly in love with someone, and he loves me back. In fact he told me that he would get his best friend and disappear off the face of the earth and live in the woods if I dumped him- that's how much he loves me. But this song seriously makes me think that he dumped me. (BMF- I still think about Hawaii...) I guess ...

This song is love.

LOVE Love has been on my mind lately. Not because I am in love so I think everyone should be too, (although sometimes I wish I could force everyone to be in love... but that's more like one of those spread the good news things then thinking I'm superior) but just the general subject of love. A few days ago I was driving and I was pondering on a quest I embarked on during my college years. It was to find a movie that did not have love in it. It was during a particularly long dry spell when I didn't even have a crush on anyone (shocking right?) and I didn't want to deal with romance, love or anything of the sort. I couldn't find one. I thought that since my life was so love free and movies (mostly) try to be realistic that, surely, there would be one movie that didn't have a romantic plot-line, twist or happy couple in it. Couldn't do it- it seems all movies have some sort of subplot that featured love. So I was thinking back on this quest. Why ...

My first ever Celebrity crush was Harrison Ford. What a babe! The amazing thing is that he still looks amazing even now....   Then in my tween years  it was all about JTT  In college this was hanging up in my hallway... I didn't think it was right to be greedy with all this perfection   Look at that. WOW. And for current celeb crushes... well it appears I have a type! Dark, facial hair, generally hot...

Just an old article to share with you all. Christina Hendricks, the redhead from Mad Men, wrote an open letter to guys in Esquire a bit a go and I agree with most of it. Check it out here!

I'm a cynical romantic. It's another one of my odd contradictions. I love romantic movies and fairy tale endings, but I don't believe they're real- even though I want them to be. For instance, I know I mentioned earlier that someone I know got married INSANELY quickly. Now from a bit of Facebook evaluation it seems that it might have ended. Here's the thing- deep down I really wanted it to work. I wanted to believe this this romantic, swept away in love gesture could be real. I wanted to see a real-life fairy tale. Then this morning I checked PostSecret and I saw this postcard. Oh my gosh, I wanted to email in and be like "I DEMAND AN UPDATE!" For some reason, I needed to know how this was going to work out. My thought process after reading this was, "Oh I hope she says yes!" then it was "he's probably some jerk that treated her bad and so she left and she's finally free and happy". And I was torn. I wondered if s...

So I'm not very good at New Years Resolutions, but I seem to be good at Birthday (or after my birthday) resolutions so I thought I'd do that again this year... and now I'm posting it for the world to see to hold me accountable. Finish paying off all my debt (minus student loans- that's still like 5 yrs out) Size 8... it's only one size down I know I can do it! Use my passport for somewhere other than Canada (it's embarrassing that it's the only country on that) Run a 5k Run a 10k Be ready for the Disneyland Marathon (half?) Take at least a semester of Spanish... by my birthday I could be almost done with a 2nd semester. Love more. This may expand but it's pretty lofty right now!

So I know every girl in the world claims they're not like "every other girl" and usually I want to punch someone in the throat when they claim that because, let's be honest- you are, but I've finally found out one aspect of my life where I'm not like MOST girls. It's my "love language". So let me explain. I recently read a book called "The 5 Love Languages" and at the end, if you haven't already figured out which one you speak- it provides you with a quiz to figure it out on your own. I took the quiz and had a pretty good idea what it was going to say, but I had no idea that it would tell me that I completely fail at receiving love through words. I guess I should start at the beginning (which is an awfully good place to start). There are 5 love languages: Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Service, Physical Touch and Gifts. It's about how you show your love and how you best receive love. I pretty much knew that Service and ...

So I'm pretty sure no one reads this, which is why I never bother to update, but since I was browsing my friend's blogs tonight I decided to read mine and realized it was incredibly whinny so I should probably update. I came to a sad realization the other night, and it was how much I love my dog. I mean I knew I loved him, but I have found it's very apparent to everyone else how much I love him too, it hit home when I had a friend say, "oh even though we've never met him we KNOW Batman!" It's a sad day to realize that you talk about your dog more than some people talk about their kids. Anyway, so what's been new can be explained very quickly: Even though I work at one of the biggest corporations in America I feel like I'm caught on an episode of Melrose Place EFY!!! I work 6am- 3pm Tues. through Sat. so my social life is pretty shot Insane things keep happening to me- things such as my car being broken into and the only thing of "...

I find it amazing that so many songs I LOVE I don't know the lyrics for. And it use to bug me so much, that I would say I love a song but then have no recollection of the lyrics. But then I realized that what makes those songs amazing is that I can't remember them. They are true art a that point because they transform you and they transport you to another place or another time. That is how I find art I love... pieces I can just stare at for hours that for some reason stops me in my tracts and makes me think. A piece that just makes time stand still and speed all at the same time. Something that makes me pause and remember all the happy/ sad/ exciting/ troubling times of my life and reminisce for a while. This is what some songs do to me as well. It's probably not the best thing that I'm behind the wheel when this occurs, but there are some songs that I hear the first few lines and then I don't hear anything because I'm lost in my own world. I love the fe...

So I've never been a big fan of New Years Resolutions because 1. it only gives me a year to complete it 2. everyone expects you to fail and 3. well I can never think of what I want to resolve. I would like to think I'm constantly growing and improving myself and that I don't need a new year to make a change in my life. So here's my list of things I hope to accomplish in the next 5 years, and because I have OCD I've breaking it into sections. Financial- No more loans :) Own property... or at least start owning property... which might negate #1 but that is more in reference to student loans and my car payment. Contribute more that what I currently to my 401k... it's a pretty pathetic amount, but to contribute more I need to earn more! Educational- I would like to take the following classes: Spanish or become conversational in French since I've wasted so much time on that language already. Cake decorating Flower arranging Pilates Belly dancing ...