ya know... that song that was on...

I find it amazing that so many songs I LOVE I don't know the lyrics for. And it use to bug me so much, that I would say I love a song but then have no recollection of the lyrics. But then I realized that what makes those songs amazing is that I can't remember them. They are true art a that point because they transform you and they transport you to another place or another time.

That is how I find art I love... pieces I can just stare at for hours that for some reason stops me in my tracts and makes me think. A piece that just makes time stand still and speed all at the same time. Something that makes me pause and remember all the happy/ sad/ exciting/ troubling times of my life and reminisce for a while.

This is what some songs do to me as well. It's probably not the best thing that I'm behind the wheel when this occurs, but there are some songs that I hear the first few lines and then I don't hear anything because I'm lost in my own world. I love the feeling it brings to my soul, because at the end even if it's a sad thing the song makes me remember I still feel and everyday that I feel I know that I've lived; even if for just a little bit.

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The Rules of Dieting

Hi my name is Michelle and I have a very unhealthy relationship with food and dieting and the small amount of fat that resides on my mid section. There is something empowering and depressing about this all at once. It's empowering because I recognize it and I can sometimes remember it and control my brain, but it's depressing because I'm sure it's something that will only be fixed by therapy and time and I don't want to put in the work. Also, as a MO it's really one of the few vices I get... and really there are worse vices. As some of you know I was in the running to be on a infomercial. With it came food delivered to my door (no eating out of the box!) and 6 day a week, butt kicking bootcamp classes. The food was pretty yummy (although left me very hungry) and I really enjoyed the bootcamp after the first week of being so sore I could barely move. But then things started going wrong. First, it was HARD to stay on track when people around me were e

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big changes and realizations

So Chad got into Columbia... and only Columbia so come end of August we will both be living in New York (hopefully the city and not a suburb...) I'm excited/nervous/scared/happy/proud/stressed/in awe/ every other emotion you could possibly feel. But today it all finally felt so real. I don't know why it was today... I don't know why it didn't happen when trying on dresses or tasting cake or any of the wedding planning. What made it real was talking to Chad's sister and saying "we". WE are moving to New York, WE are apartment hunting, WE aren't going to be around for Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving etc. WE are going to be in a huge city with a million people, but it's going to be just us 2 as we start building OUR life together. WOW. I'm excited.

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I got friends who... (la la la) help me pull through....

I believe everything happens for a reason. I also believe that people are brought into your life for a reason- to help you grow in one way or another. Whenever I reflect on my life what I remember most about times in my life are the people I met and bonded with... I've been blessed with a happy disposition and the ability to make friends pretty easy and because of that I have an awesome bouquet of friends who live ALL over the country (and world...) now and they all have taught me something.... It's like each period of my life (usually broken down into where I live) has that friend that has impacted my life so much... California (round 1) - Danica... we were the coolest set of best friends Atherwood has ever seen! New Jersey - Michele and Nina... my life in New Jersey didn't seem like it was in order and happy until these 2 girls were my besties! It's when I finally came to love New Jersey Utah freshman yr - Bethie... randomly became roomies... we both thought the

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