Sunday, April 5, 2009

I have no internal monologue

Well, the thing is I do... but my friend once told me that I need a better filter. I decided that would be something I would like to work on, so I did. Now for the most part I think it's a good thing I did work on this. For example, a few months ago I was on an elevator with some orange stripes, for those of you who don't speak Disney, that means Director or above. So these are the people that can very easily fire me and who I need to suck up to at all costs. One of them said something and I wanted to say "that's what she said" so very badly, but lucky for me my filter said, "NOT a good idea Michelle". But there are other times in my life where I wish I could say exactly what I'm thinking, things like
  • You look so silly right now, some trends aren't meant for you
  • Why do you have to be gay?
  • It's been a year since YOU ended it- instead of getting mad, fight for me- you'll probably win
  • Why don't you just kiss me?
  • stop complaining... no one cares anymore
  • Why do you have it out for me?
  • Just enjoy it, it's not going to last
  • Seriously, you're not happy are you?
The thing is though, you can't say stuff like that and be a good member of society... but really why is that? Why is lying and burrying it deep inside you and not telling the truth the way we should function? I can think of so many aspects of my life where being honest would save a lot of people a lot of trouble... dating is a huge one that comes to mind.