What's wrong with me

To start out I'm going to say that the subject of this post is NOT a question.

So, once upon a time there was a beautiful blonde girl who enjoyed eating whatever she wanted. She was happy and she loved eating out. In fact, one memorable girls night when most ordered salads and chicken, she ordered ribs and life was good. Then something odd started happening this past October. This beautiful girl started getting really sick. She wasn't concerned at first, but then after a while she thought, "wow I'm really not getting better, maybe I should see a doctor." Her regular doctor ran a bunch of tests but really couldn't think of anything. She decided that maybe it was time for a specialist.

After an extensive search for a highly qualified gastroenterologist she started seeing what he had to say about it. After many more tests, a cancer scare, and a host of medicines she talked to her friend about it. Turns out her friend had a similar problem and her friend suggested that she try out the diet that she was on to see if she'd feel better.

After a day or two our beautiful blonde wasn't feeling as sick and so she spoke to her doctor about it. He told her that it must be EPI that was causing all this. Which means her pancreas doesn't produce enough of the enzyme her system needs to digest animal proteins. Her body was turning it into fat until recently (which explains why our beautiful blonde was always a little chubby even when she was dieting and exercising) and now it's just rejecting it from her system. So she now has pills that help her with digestion when she just can't stand not being able to eat meat, fish, cheese, milk or a plethora of other dairy products, but mostly now her life has gone from ribs to a almost vegan life style. But don't feel too bad for her, she's managing and she keeps on smiling. And it's given her a great conversation starter at parties, office dinners and, well, she probably always needed a few more salads in her life. Let's just hope it doesn't get worse- she could lose production of all her enzymes... not cool!

Good news too is that when she skips eating mushy peas at dinner she doesn't get the " you need more vegetables in your diet" lecture anymore!